Kevin D. Carignan 
(The article is by guest writer James Jarrett. See biography below.)
After the twelve days of Christmas in the Christian liturgical year, January 6 is the feast of the Epiphany. Also known as the Day of the Three Kings, this holiday commemorates the visit of the Magi to Jesus and Mary in Bethlehem, as noted in Matthew 2: 1-12. (1) A message from Epiphany is that all the love and good that has been shown in the world through Jesus of Nazareth is for everyone, not just for one particular tribe; ethnic, religious, political or other.
According to the dictionary, an epiphany is also “a sudden, intuitive perception or understanding of the essential reality or meaning of something, usually initiated by a simple, simple, or mundane event or experience. “(2)
Epiphanies come to mind as our oldest daughter got married on Boxing Day this year. As I reflected on what I wanted to give her and her husband as they embark on life together, I compiled the following epiphanies that have come to me – sometimes suddenly and sometimes gradually – throughout of my life.
On your wedding day and in the years to come …
May you be free from suffering and the causes of suffering.
May you feel a fullness that includes lack.
May you know and trust how much you are loved.
When you feel like the luckiest people in the world …
May you give thanks.
May you rejoice in each other.
Let your analysis give way to wonder.
Remember that this too will pass.
When a conflict breaks out or slumbers between you …
May you each find the strength to stay true to yourself and your deepest values while staying close to one another.
May you each give the other space as you learn to allay your own anxieties.
May you each become skilled in non-reactivity.
May you become prepared to tolerate the discomfort for the growth of your relationship.
May each of you be guided by your integrity rather than your pain.
When life becomes unmanageable …
May you come to believe that any power greater than your own ego can restore you to sanity.
May you be retained by many supportive communities.
May your own experience of being loved grow as you serve others.
May you have the serenity to accept the things that you cannot change, the courage to change the things that you can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
When you need relief from distress …
May you come back to the present moment.
May you remember all the people who loved you.
May you inhale and exhale with your hand on your heart.
May you have the courage to feel whatever you feel, even for a moment.
May you become curious about the places in your body that can safely contain your pain.
When the bullshit transmitted by your original families becomes too heavy …
May you trust that compassion surrounds and even permeates your conditioning.
Have the courage to tell us about the harm we have caused you.
May you forgive us for our shortcomings.
May you learn from our mistakes.
When you wish things were different …
May your illusions serve you as long as you need them.
May you be enveloped in the beauty when they fall.
May you allow yourself (and life) to be as you are rather than as you would like to be.
May you find refuge in impermanence.
May you be supported by the interconnection with everything and everyone.
And finally…
May your curiosity guide you.
May you realize that there is nothing to be achieved.
May you discover the divine in the faces and stories of the people you meet.
May you always be accompanied and surrounded by love. (3)
These practices and insights continue to help me. Will they be useful to them? I hope. Probably when they need help and not before. Help can come from anything in this list of marriage blessings, or it can come another way. For, it is the nature of an epiphany to come to us when we need it and in a way that is unmistakably for us.
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REMARKS:
1 The account can be found in Matthew 2: 1-12
2. From (Dictionary.com)
3. Sources: The Buddha, John of Patmos, David Schnarch, Bill Wilson, Reinhold Niebuhr, M. Rogers, Deborah Grassman, Frank Ostaseski, Jesus of Nazareth and me.
Also, for a beautiful new epiphany, see The story of the other sage by Henry van Dyke. Available at your favorite bookseller and here at Project Gutenberg: https://www.gutenberg.org/files/10679/10679-h/10679-h.htm.
Biography : James Jarrett lives with his partner Katie in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. They have six children. A licensed lawyer and former church planter, James is approved by the Humanist Society as a chaplain and celebrant supporting full-time people in hospice care. He posts poetry, articles, and random thoughts on his blog Becoming Human. (https://devenirhumain122.wordpress.com/)
